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You Have Everything You Need, But You Feel Numb

Life feels hard. Every day is a struggle to push through. You show up, but you are barely there. You spent most of your time lost in daydreams and fantasies to pass the time and do the right thing. Maybe you smoke a little herb, or you look forward to a beer or a glass of wine when you get home. You deserve the reprieve. You work hard. You work really hard. You pay your bills. You take care of people. You deserve to lighten your load a little bit. But if you are honest with yourself, you're tired of having to distract yourself from the truth that you feel numb. 


raileigh easterling mountain retreat

You don't fully like yourself or enjoy where you are in life. You are tired. So tired. But that doesn't matter. Life is about hustle and hard work. Life does not care about how you feel; it only takes. You are here to do what needs to be done, to sleep when you can, and to tolerate the bullshit. You never let struggles hold you back, but if in some other world, if you had the time to sit in a safe and soft place where someone could hold you and listen to your heart, you would probably cry. You are not a soft person. You don't hug people much, you don't tell many people you love them, and you never let anyone see you struggle. You are not a sad person. You are actually pretty accepting of how life is. But life just is not easy. It is better not to hope too much or risk too much. 


You were once a dreamer, but those kinds of dreams are for children. You are an adult. You take life seriously. You play it safe because it is the responsible thing to do. You are reliable. You are consistent. But something within you longs for more. You don't talk about it because it would embarrass you to become too happy about something, and then someone judges you. You don't need people to know how you really feel or what you really desire. You control the image of yourself to the world. You like it that way. You like routine. Life doesn't bore you; you actually feel very safe in predictability. You don't have many people in your life, and you don't really care. It's their problem if they don't like you. You don't need anyone in your life, and you don't need any help. But secretly, you wish someone would offer some help and support. But you would never ask them. You wish people could see how soft your heart really is behind your tough exterior. You're tired. You are not sure how much further you can go on like this. 


Lately, you are starting to feel some things…mostly anger and rage. Disappointment. But these feelings expose the fact that maybe you do care what people think. You sure as hell won't let people see you cry over them. More wine. Maybe some herb will help. Maybe the pills will dull the aches in your body. Maybe more coffee will help you feel motivated to keep going and showing up. Because it is the right thing to do. What you truly long for, what you pray for, never matters. Life is not about feeling good or accomplishing great things. You are fine with what you have. Even if it isn't very much. Life is quiet, but filled with noise. The TV volume is always on high, the music is always playing in the car, and you spend most of your free time shopping in busy stores. This is life. There is not much more to it.  


Is this you or someone you care about? 


I am offering 1-on-1 coaching sessions for those seeking sacred space to journey on the path of self-development, healing, and spirituality. If you are seeking some spark, joy, some more clarity on how to make your life feel more exciting and yet focused in a positive and meaningful direction, I would be happy to speak with you. Life is not meant to be dull and boring! Let me help you remember why you came to this Earth, because there is indeed a very sacred reason. 


Here are three tips to help engage more meaning and fullness in your life:


  1. Become as sober as possible. Most substances block us from feeling the full range of our emotions, and our grief. Becoming sober is a grieving process; but it opens the portal to a new life of joy that you have never known or experienced before. You have to trust this as truth and have the discipline (with compassionate and professional support) to see this through. 


  1. Establish more authentic relationships: relationships that excite you and motivate you to be a better version of yourself. Often times we hold ourselves back from fulfilling relationships because of shyness and challenges with self-esteem. It is worth pursing new friendships and connections with people you admire, even at risk of rejection.


  1. Quiet the noises and stimulation in your life. Give your nervous system opportunities to rest. When your body is in peace, we become more guided by soul-desires. This is because we are releasing the fear that lives within our body that controls our mental scripts. Spend more time meditating in nature and in silence. Expose yourself more to the natural elements – bask in the warmth of a campfire, take a dip in the ocean, hike in the forest, and dance in the rain. Open your heart to infinite paths and opportunities in life that most naturally make you feel wonderful, purposeful, and most alive. 


What are your thoughts on this kind of advice? What emotions come up? Do you find any of it weird or uncomfortable, and if so, why? What is the most important reason you can come up with to perhaps give them a try?


Wishing you peace and joy on your most divine path,


Raileigh Easterling



Upcoming virtual offerings…


LET IT BE WRITTEN: INTENSIVE WEEKEND WORKSHOP

Nov 7- 9, 2025


90 DAY COACHING PORTAL: EXPAND YOUR SOUL WORK

Jan 5- April 5, 2026


Limited spots available.



Raileigh Easterling is the Founder of Conscious Lifestyle Coaching LLC. She is a motivational author, poet, & public speaker; a transformational retreat host & mindfulness teacher; and a business & public relations consultant. Conscious Lifestyle Coaching LLC is a sacred space for entrepreneurs, changemakers, and visionaries on the path of self-development, healing, and spirituality to experience transformation and holistic growth.


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